Science Verses Art

In Honor of Steve Jobs

Science

Typically you are thought of as black and white

but when these notions mix, there indeed is gray

and my matter wraps itself in an elongated and twisted figure eight.

It’s difficult to debate your existence

for if I did I’d be debating mine as well.

You never make enough sense to me until you do and then it’s all crystals

dependable

regular

sharp and complicated

you are a pattern that needs not my cooperation,

because, frankly, you’ll do it anyway.

You remind me of my ex-boyfriend like that.

Standing behind every good thing –

I really appreciate the support,

just don’t ask me to figure you out –

it’s not my thing.

I think you think too much

and no one could hope to keep up,

you remind me of myself like that.

I fear the world’s implosion if ever your equation cracked – you’re vindictive like that.

Art

blank,

and you mean something.

colored and etched and rioted, and you mean something

slashed and exasperated and deeply deeply sighed,

you mean

something.

There is never a time when you are without meaning –

reason, however is debatable.

You don’t have to be good to be good

and you can be really bad without being bad.

More than a rulebreaker, you just don’t give a damn.

The collective conscious will spend forever pondering you

and it is exactly the ego you crave.

You are ethereal, ephemeral, and tempermental.

You will change your notion with a twist of wind

and never remember it being otherwise.

I’d be wise to stay away from you, but I can’t –

You remind me of my ex-boyfriend like that.

Somewhere, someone has your number

and they keep calling and calling and calling

I’m always curious what the message is.

I wonder what would happen if you settled down,

committed to a marriage

let someone own you.

I wonder what would happen to the rest of us.

 

Then Verses Now

Then

I didn’t know what nostalgia really was
Flitted between concepts of myself,
FItted into a corset of a social circle where each piece of boning pinched me.
I listened to really depressing music and wondered why I was always so depressed.
Preferred public transportation.
Said yes to everything, seriously almost everything
and wondered what was wrong with me if I stayed in for even one night.
I had secret weapons but didn’t now how to use them.
Never knew who my friends were, until they showed me,
and by then it was often too late.
I dated everyone,
unless they were my friend and by then it was often too late.
I never got what I wanted
unless I did
and again
it was often too late,
or not good enough
or not exactly what I asked for enough
or not enough enough.
I was always much tougher than I let on or let myself believe.
That was Then.

Now

I have no problem screaming in public
no matter rhyme, reason or occasion.
because most people secretly want to do the same.
I would still date everyone except everyone thinks I’m already taken.
I prefer my own company,
until I don’t.
I forgot exactly which secret weapons I have because that’s how often I need to use them.
Second nature.
No one word holds any new meaning,
it is their stringing together that turns me on.
I know what I like but I’m still open to suggestion.
I know who my friends are,
and the good ones show me.
The others can go fuck themselves.
The only rules that apply are the ones I think are good enough to help a girl out.
Sometimes I get what I want,
only I didn’t know it’s what I wanted til I got it,
or I didn’t know it’s what I wanted until I didn’t get it
so then I have to ask for it all over again.
I don’t care if I repeat myself, in whatever way that applies because
This is Now.

Sex Verses Coffee

              Sex

• I like it best in the morning.
• I can make this happen by myself but it is much better when someone else helps in the making of it happen
• much preferred hot and steamy but the involvement of ice is alright by me.
• abstinence has never really crossed my mind since the first time I tried it 
• Sometimes gives me energy
• Sometimes makes me lightheaded
• Sometimes it’s a lesser than version than I had imagined
• Sometimes feels like a new invention
• Sometimes feels like the same thing I’ve had every morning
• Sometimes flavored
• Sometimes sweet
• Sometimes dark and heavy and I’m not sure this is a good idea.
• Sometimes I know that this is not a good idea.
• * Sometimes I don’t care that I know that this is not a good idea. 
• I am pretty much always ready for seconds
• Seconds aren’t always as monumental as firsts
• I am probably day dreaming
• I am probably day dreaming of this on a plane to JFK
• I am probably day dreaming of this on the way to somewhere mundane that won’t meet my needs.
• I heard somewhere that it’s good for you.
• I heard somewhere that it’s bad for you.There is always an aftermath.

  
  

  Coffee

• I like it best in the morning.
• I can make this happen by myself but it is much better when someone else helps in the making of it happen
• much preferred hot and steamy but the involvement of ice is alright by me.
• abstinence has never really crossed my mind since the first time I tried it. 
• Sometimes gives me energy
• Sometimes makes me lightheaded
• Sometimes it’s a lesser than version than I had imagined
• Sometimes feels like a new invention
• Sometimes feels like the same thing I’ve had every morning
• Sometimes flavored
• Sometimes sweet
• Sometimes dark and heavy and I’m not sure this is a good idea.
• Sometimes I know that this is not a good idea.
• Sometimes I don’t care that I know that this is not a good idea. 
• I am pretty much always ready for seconds
• Seconds aren’t always as monumental as firsts
• I am probably day dreaming
• I am probably day dreaming of this on a plane to JFK
• I am probably day dreaming of this on the way to somewhere mundane that  won’t meet my needs.
• I heard somewhere that it’s good for you.
• I heard somewhere that it’s bad for you.There is always an aftermath.